Good morning, everyone! I hope you are having a great morning. I have spent my morning over-thinking a gift I will be giving to someone in the near future. A complete waste of time, yes, but I've been idling away my time doing it, just the same.
You may ask yourself why I am over-thinking the gift. Am I not happy with the selection? That's not it. Do I really want to give this person a gift? Of course I do. She is my friend and I am happy for her. The event she is experiencing in her life, which is the reason for the gift, is something she has wanted for a very long time and she deserves it. The reason it weighs so heavily on my mind is because I wanted it, too. It wasn't in the cards for me, as they say, which is a bitter pill to swallow sometimes, isn't it?
Nevertheless, we ignore the lump in our throat and we hold our chin up high and give our friend the gift in celebration of them. This makes me question myself - am I really happy for her? Yes, after very little reflecting, I am very happy for her, and I guess it's okay to feel a little twinge of something - not jealousy, not envy, just something - almost a mournful feeling that I keep pushing to the back of my mind. Wow! This blog has become very heavy! Not the intent, I assure you!
My intent, I guess, is to remind people, mostly myself, that it is okay to feel that twinge, whatever it is that isn't jealousy or envy, but feels mildly similar. Let yourself feel it. Don't push it to the back of your mind. It doesn't make you a bad person, and it doesn't mean you are not truly happy for your friend. You are, you know you are!
As human beings, I think it's completely normal to see or hear about someone having something you have always wanted and you feel that "twinge" because you don't have it and you know you never will. You can still revel in their good fortune, celebrate with them, laugh with them, and look them in the eye and truly mean it when you say, "I'm Happy for You!"
i couldn't agree more. my friend is doing something i've always dreamed about doing. i've been very close to where she's at in life but i did not take the complete plunge as she has....and i'm happy for her. at first when i felt that twinge you speak of i also wondered was it jealousy but as i reflected i realized it was not. we do need to celebrate for those who accomplish, conquer, rise above, or are just plain blessed in a way we are not. rejoice and find the beauty of your own life. we each are unique and have special gifts, may all of you find yours and have peace right where you are and with who you are.
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